Thursday, October 21, 2010

Four Years

I can distinctly remember sitting in one of my Marriage & Family classes in my graduate program several years ago. One of my favorite (and best) instructors, Dr. Brenda Dew, was telling us about recent research that revealed that couples were more likely to hit serious rough patches and/or file for divorce in odd years of their marriage than in even years. At the time, I thought it was a load of crap. Now that we're celebrating our fourth year of marriage, I have to wonder if maybe there's more than a little truth in that.
Please don't get me wrong...David and I have a very happy marriage and we're devoted to one another, but this year has been tough! Over the course of our third year of marriage, we built a house, moved in, lost our first baby to a miscarriage, watched close family members struggle with some tough stuff, and made it through our September "due date" with the baby that we didn't get to have. And through all of that, there have been some really tough, dark times. Thankfully, somehow, during all of that, I recognized that the way we handle those situations together would make us or break us. There were times when for some reason, my first instinct was to snap at him or take out my frustrations, anger, and fears on him (and I probably did, to some degree), but I did my best to choose not do those things. Instead, we leaned on each other, our families, friends, and our God, and we've made it through. Things are looking great for our fouth year of marriage...in fact, we just got back from a week-long cruise vacation (which was much needed!) in order to kind of hit the "reset" button. Through it all, I can truly say that life is good, and I couldn't imagine spending my life with anyone besides David. He is an amazing husband, and I look forward to sharing the rest of life's ups and downs with him. Love you, David!

2 comments:

  1. Congrats on your anniversary! Hubs & I had our fourth year anniversary in June, and I agree, the 3rd year was hard for us too. Just a lot of tough adjustments--me quitting my job, my health getting worse, stress over his job security...lots. And I didn't know that you had miscarried, but I'm sorry that you have had to deal with that. Here's to marriages that last a lifetime--good stuff and bad!!

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  2. I can't tell you how much I love you both. It has been a really rough year,but I admire the way you have handled the bad stuff and really looked for the good things when they weren't that easy to find. I hope you have many, many more happy years of marriage, and remember that I am always here for you.

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